Life Sucks Sometimes.... GET OVER IT!!!!

You know, I've got plenty of reason to be angry. A whole lot. From a car crash, to my parents about to kick me out, I have a lot of reason to be angry. From debt to court. Blah Blah Blah! So many things have happened in the last couple weeks that I've finally said FUCK IT! I don't even care anymore. I've gotten to the point where if something bad happens, my attitude just says "Whatever." I feel like I've grown Immune to problems. Anything fired at me, I don't budge, cause I don't feel. But I do want to say one thing. Sam, if I were in Deena's position, (that is having two people owe her over 1000 dollars each) I'd do the same thing. I really don't blame her at all. I doubt you'll even read this because for some reason you've decided to never ever talk to me again. I've got more reason to hate you, Sam, and still, I text, I call you, but you never ever answer. "Whatever." I just don't care anymore.

I know this is not good. I know becoming immune can only lead to bad places, but i just don't care anymore. Not. One. Bit.

My dad found my hookah. Told me that that was the last straw. If he finds anything else, I'm out. I crashed his car coming down the canyon. Almost flipped over. I didn't flip out as much as I should have. Ask Rob.

I've lost all feelings.

And I don't care.

The only thing good, :-), is my Alexis. On the 23rd, it will be our 5 month mark. Can't wait for 6. :-> She's the only thing keeping me in Utah. Even then, if we're still together, she wants me to move to Florida with her in a year and a half. And that, I really can't wait for. Get out of Utah. Have a fresh start. Do everything that I meant to do. Get a real job. Be who I want to be, without being criticized and hurt for it. I'm sick of this place, and as soon as I pay deena off, I'm out of my parents house for good. I'll fuckin sleep on the streets if I have to. I'm Done.

OMG!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY NESSA!!!!

HAPPY 18TH NEESA!! I MISS YOU!!! HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN WAY TOO LONG!!! :-P

OH MY GOD!!!!

So I just got back from watching "This Is It". OH. MY. GOD. It was absolutely fantastic! He was such a character, such a genius. Man I wish he could've at least done one show! I definitely recommend said movie to all y'all!

If you hadn't noticed, I deleted my last post. The reason? Well, I have a tendency to gravitate to anyone who will listen, even if it hurts someone else. I'm working on that. Those were very personal things about my girl, but it happened. She's doing better, if you were wondering. At first she wasn't sure if she wanted me to come over, but a few days later, her mom called me at work. She told me that her daughter needs me. That, even if she may not want me, she needs me. Kathleen said that she was acting very lonely and just getting worse. So, Friday night, after picking up Cameron, I went over there. I didn't know if it was going to be awkward at all. I opened the door, and she grabbed me, and wouldn't let me go. :-) It felt so good to hold her in my arms. I love you, Lex!!!

hmmm.... What else to blog about?

I'm getting a car!!!! It's a Geo tracker, otherwise known as a Suzuki.. something, can't remember. It's basically a Jeep knock-off. It's so amazing! But, of course, I have to come up with the money. Five-hundred dollars down. It isn't too bad, but when you're in debt in more than one place, like me, it is quite a lot. Still, I can't wait to get it!

OH!!! By the way! Rob and Amber are moving to Lehi!!! They'll be closer!!! They found a 3 bedroom house with a studio basement, and a fireplace outback for the same price as their paying for their apartment! So that's awesome! And I may be moving into that studio apartment sometime! So stoked!!!

Anyways, thanks for reading! At least this time it was a happy blog right?

--Jorden

LIVING IN A DUMP!!!!!

Well, I have moved home.

Is It Even Describable?

I'm in a really really good mood! I don't know what it is. Maybe just because I'm actually working towards something. I'm actually earning money. I'm actually getting ready to start my life again. Yeah, so I have to move home. Whatever, it's not going to kill me. I can handle a little discomfort, right, Cam? It may just be because I found my old hoodie from eighth grade! :-P HAHA! And now I'm chewing on the hoodie strings, just like I used to. What a bad habit! Or it may just be because of my wonderful girl, Alexis. But whatever it is, I'm in a surprisingly good mood. I say we should all keep in contact. It'd be insanely awesome if, twenty years from now, when we all have kids and a new life, we were still blogging and telling everyone from the old apartment how we're doing. It's amazing what technology can do. :-> Love you guys! I'm looking forward to seeing you guys again! :-P

Anyway, so I'm just kinda sitting here at training for my new job and I'm kinda bored. We're on break, and I have nothing to do for the next ten minutes, so I decided to blog! :-P But, I now have nothing to talk about! I love the leaves at this time of the year. They're so beautiful. It's funny, cause I absolutely hate cold weather, but I love looking at snow, and listening to christmas music, and sitting by the fire. If there was a way for it to snow only in December, I might just be okay with that. Hmm.. I think I'm going to pull out my Christmas music. I really want to listen to it now. :-P I know, I know. Halloween hasn't even passed yet, but you know, at least I'm not as bad as retail stores. They had christmas stuff at Wal-Mart in the back when I was working there. That was the end of September!!!! God that's too early!

I should post a picture.... Hmm....

What about this one?




I love her!!!!!!!

Maybe this one too! I made it on Paint!



I was bored....

Well, love you all!

Jorden

The Never Ending Game Of Life!

HMM.... WHERE TO START?!?!?!?!?!?

I'll go good news first!!!! I can't say life is too amazing right now, but I can say that it'll work out for the best.
First, the issue with Alexis' mom really didn't have much to do with me dating her daughter. I was just overstaying my visit. She would like to have her home to herself every once in a while and I completely understand. I was over there 12/7, no joke! I'd wake up, go over, come home, go to bed! :-P That's how much I love Alexis! Anyways, Alexis and I are doing just as grand as ever. I know I've said this about pretty much every girlfriend I've ever had.... I tend to exaggerate things.... but this time is different. I know, roll your eyes, you've heard it before. But really, this is different. This time I completely quit looking for a girlfriend, in fact, I didn't want one! I know! It's insane! Jorden didn't want a girlfriend?!?!?!?!?!? I just got sick of it. Ever since Julia, I have been looking for someone to marry. Every time I found someone, I would just dive in on the idea. And then scare them all away! I'm really good at that! Well I finally just gave up! Completely! Then Alexis just happened. It was really weird. As soon as I give up, she just walks right into my life. Apparently Alexis has a real temper. Well, her mom says that ever since I came around she's calmed down a ton! And then, on the other end, she's calmed my wild side down. No sex, no drugs, all because of her. And, to top it all off, we both have the SAME DREAM CAR!!! HAHA! The 1967 Shelby Cobra GT 500! MMMMM! Anyways, that's the good news.

The bad news. Well, I have to move home. For various reasons, but one the most of all. Deena. I love her to death, but she pulled an unexpected on me. She filed court papers for the money that Sam and I owe her. So, now, on top of wanting a car, paying rent, and expenses, I would now have to pay that. Well, it wasn't going to happen. I am now having to move downstairs to a little space, (that's right, a space, not a room) behind the couch in my family room so that I can pay everything off. It's absolutely ridiculous. I don't know how long I will last in my parent's basement, (what a damper on my ego... ugh!). Life is definitely an interesting place.

Well, thanx for reading!
Jay
P.S. I don't know if I will be able to post much more this week until I move home.

Adults and Children

I often wonder if there is a difference. Between Adults and Children, that is. I thought there was. There should be. But the more and more I look, the less and less I see a line between the two. Take my parents for example. So I moved out, I didn't go on a mission. That is my choice. When I moved into my latest apartment, my dad was flat out rude to my new roommates. He was angry and frustrated that I wasn't coming home, but that gave him no right to be so rude. Also, everytime I tell him that I may have a job, or this came up, this is awesome, my dad just shoots me down. It's like he doesn't want me to succeed. Or, no, let me take that back. He wants me to come home, and succeed the way he wants me to.

Another example. My girlfriend is fantastic. We complete each other so well. And her mom loved me! So much to the point of offering to help me find a job. I was and idiot and declined her offer, because I'm a little selfish. I wanted to do it on my own. That was an idiotic mistake, but I did. Now, she thinks I'm lazy and irresponsible and is trying to break us up. I don't understand it. Apparently Alexis had a very high temper. But I've never seen it. Her mom told me that I've calmed her down a ton. Now she's telling Alexis that I'm a Dead Beat!!! I texted her mom. This is exactly what it said:
Hi Kathleen, I just wanted to talk like adults.
That's exactly what I said, and she calls Alexis and says that she feels that I am harassing her. I hadn't even said anything before that, and had not even seen her for days. She is acting like a child.

I'm only 19, and I feel that I'm more mature than all these "adults" that surround me. I just can't believe it.